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Orlin Grabbe Versus Joseph Famularo III

by J. Orlin Grabbe

US Attorney Joseph Famularo now says he doesn't know what went on at the bail hearing for Chuck Hayes in London, KY, on Friday, Oct. 25. After all, he sent his assistant Martin Hatfield (606-864-5523) to ask questions of FBI agent David Keller. Famularo had more important things to do. Like prepare for Bill Clinton's visit to Lexington. Or play golf.

Yes, Famularo says he did get Orlin Grabbe's faxes. But he didn't ask Martin Hatfield about them. Hatfield is much too important for that. Hatfield's even more important than Janet Reno. Hatfield is god. If Hatfield wants Famularo to know something, he'll tell him. Otherwise Famularo had better mind his own business.

Yes Famularo's name is on the grand jury indictment for Chuck Hayes. But he doesn't know anything about that either. After all, he had First Assistant US Attorney Marianne What's-the-name sign that. He can't keep track of what Marianne does. Marianne's been out of control for a long time.

Yes, Famularo does have that Criminal Complaint (Case #96-6101M) signed by Special Agent of the FBI David Keller, Complainant, and J.B. Johnson, Jr., Judicial Officer. That's why he sent Hatfield over. Hatfield just does whatever the FBI tells him to do. The FBI gave him a list of questions to ask. That's fine, because the FBI always tells the truth. And they always get their man, like at Waco and Ruby Ridge, and with Richard Jewell in the Atlanta bombing. Besides, David Keller has a nice ass.

No, Joseph Famularo is not responsible for what goes on in the US Attorney's office. Usually he just lets Wanda Roberts run things. Or the janitor. Or the janitor's dog. Famularo isn't responsible for any of the cases. Or for any of the questions asked in court. Or for the quality of the evidence. Or for anything the FBI says or does.

Yes, Joseph Famularo is kind of like Max Headroom. His mind is a blank slate, a tabula rasa. He sees nothing. He hears nothing. He knows nothing. Except, of course, when it comes to the identity of Chuck Hayes and Orlin Grabbe. Famularo knows they are the same person. He's got the cash to prove it.

November 21, 1996
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