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Join the IRS: Deal Crack with Pay!

by J. Orlin Grabbe

The five crack-dealing, taxpayer-file-selling IRS employees at the Covington, Kentucky, office I reported on in previous posts were placed on administrative leave, I was told by the office of public affairs.

What the office of public affairs forgot to tell me, was these employees were placed on administrative leave WITH PAY . A paid vacation would, of course, prevent their obtaining more taxpayer files to sell for $500 a pop. But it would give them more free time to sell cocaine--this activity funded by the taxpayer money their IRS colleagues were collecting.

The office of public affairs (606-292-5652) began getting 30 to 40 phone calls a day after my Internet post. So they hooked up an answering with a message promising to return calls, if you left your name and number. But I hear they weren't actually calling anyone back. Just collecting those names and numbers, I guess.

"I would like to get my hands on that Orlin Grabbe," one IRS executive was overheard to say. Why? Did she want to sell me some crack?

By the way, do you think she calculated all the itemized deductions correctly on the latest 1040 she filed? (You can purchase a copy for $500, I hear.)

You might want to take a peak at http://www.cato.org, and look for Policy Analysis No. 222, "Why You Can't Trust the IRS," by Daniel J. Pilla. Also read #193, "The Economic Impact of Replacing Federal Income Taxes with a Sales Tax," by Laurence J. Kotlikoff. These are published by the CATO Institute, a Washington think tank, at 1000 Massachusetts Ave., N.W., Washington, D.C. 20001, phone 202-842-0200, fax 202-842-3490.

Don't you think it's time to get rid of the crack-dealing, tax-collecting, privacy-invading IRS? I mean, after you've had time to purchase tax files on all your political enemies, of course.

September 26, 1996
Web Page: http://www.aci.net/kalliste/